1. Well, since you asked—more than I want to admit.
2. Yes, I have, and it hurt like the dickens.
3. When hell freezes over, you jackass.
4. I might, if I have enough vodka tonics racing through my veins—teeheehee. Oh You!
5. Because if I don’t, the voices in my head take over by shouting and jumping up and down and punching me in the brain and playing football with my synapses and it ain’t pretty, and in fact, is rather disturbingly weirdly fascinating.
6. I will if you will.
7. There is no evidence. You can’t prove it.
8. Yes, they are real; they have always been real; they will forevermore be real; they have been real since 5th or 6th grade and they will be real when I die. Everything from the tippity top to the bittity bottom is Real and Mine. Please stop asking.
9. A lot more than you think *coy smile*
10. Three big huge earth-shattering ones, but I was alone. *winks*