Thought for the day: The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. Wow! … There’s all kind of thoughts I’d be having if this happened to me. If it re-arranged the molecules of the chocolate, what else did it re-arrange? Huhn. Sometimes when I’m in the MRI, I can swear I feel things moving around in my body…no, really! I could swear I feel my molecules rising up, pulling against each other – it’s an odd feeling, but I should be used to odd feelings. Like that old toy where you’d move the magnet around on the plastic and the little filings underneath would make a beard on the man’s face or whatever–that’s how my molecules felt in the MRI, like those filings moving around and when I’d come out, I’d be somehow changed inside, rearranged. ("You is full up with the sillies, Girlie. I had a cat like that onest, after it hit its head on a rusty pole and it part-a-ways stuck in its brain and I had’a pull it out and the cat went wild then keeled over and slept for six days, it weren’t never the same after that, just plain off is all. That’s you, Miz Kathryn, will all respect implicadated. hehehe")
Since Charles has decreed that Dang! is the new damn (he says I got him saying Dang all the time now but that’s Clementine’s fault ("T’aint either. Huh.")) Hot DANG! Last night was great! I was tired yesterday, and stressed all day, but I tic’d some things off my list and made sure I ate enough food and took my vitamins, did my workout, yoga and all, and deep breaths. I was still feeling headachy on the way to the theater, but then something happened when I got there – I saw Mark Jones, our director, out front and he just made me smile to see him, just seeing his face without him saying a word and I was smiling and calmed. Then when I went inside, Charles smiled at me and I felt even better. Then the other cast members were gathering and I was soon grinning and goofing around. (“Yup, she were as foamy as a rabid coon, or that cat I bespoked of.”)
We did the entire music score and for the first time I really enjoyed music rehearsal to its fullest. At first it felt a bit lackluster, but then something happened, we became energized and the FEEL of the play came through. I began to feel electrified. At one point, I thought, “I could do this again…” SCREECH!(that’s the sound of the record scratch and then complete shocked silence)…teehee, I know I know. But I still had that thought sneak its way into my brain and kind of settle there like a mischievous gnome. No no no no, I have to push that thought Out Out Out! I repeat: I am not an actor…not a singer…not a dancer. And there is still the Opening Night and all the nights we’ll be On Stage for real, with an audience – EEK!
But what energized me last night was I finally thought, “You know, I’m going to sing this like I’ll be singing on opening night. This isn’t Just Music and Words – this is a part of the body of the play – there is hearts and lungs and blood and sweat and bones…the whole body with its soul and emotion and …and"…well, I was suddenly moved…just moved. And that changed how I reacted to the music. I had fun with it, but I also let it seep into me – become a part of me. I could see how it’s all pulling together. And to feel part of a team is different for me, as writing and editing is so solitary and I can feel quite lonely and very disconnected. I realize I let that disconnection get in the way of my interactions with people, because I do have a hard time connecting, but this play is pulling me out, sometimes kicking and screaming, and other times I gladly let it happen. A lot of it, too, is because these people are creative, but as well, they are welcoming, encouraging, and nonjudgemental of my weirdness. ("And peoples is just peoples, Miz Kathryn. They’s doing the best they can, jest like you is. Done you think they worry over they’s own thangs without having to worry over yourn?") But, that camaraderie is warming. I feel their energy and want to vampire things from them to store away for later.
It’s our last music rehearsal. Next week we get down to the nitty gritty of the play, where it all starts to pull together. (“Like scrambled up eggs. hehehe.”)
Even the seemingly random stuff isn’t random. I mean everything has its place—“random” events” and “spur of the moment” or spontaneous moments are choreographed or directed for the most effect so they seem random or spontaneous, but are not. Although, for part of “Comfort and Joy” we can ad-lib our EXPLOSIVE JOY And of course we can develop our character into an individual (“Like I ain’t a intervidual. Huh. You done have to develerp a thang. I am who I surely am.”)
I did my SCREAM last night and it hurt my throat – Strother said I need to learn how to do the scream from my belly or diaphragm or something, instead of my throat. I guess I have to push it out from somewhere other than my throat…huhn. I was loud though, least I sounded loud to myself.
The other ngiht, Tabitha talked to me, too, about the arm things, and Lorraine and I had sat together and did the arm/hand slappity things together to practice. I did it fine like that, but when it was time to do it again last night, I Danged it up…haw.
Last night Mark and I got to laughing so hard at something we’re doing with Clementine’s walker that my stomach hurt – it’d been a while since I’ve laughed that hard. Sometimes the simplest things can just make you lose it. (Wale, I never seen the likes. You go on and laugh at my ex-pense. Huh.”)
AND…guess what? I know the opening number. I did it. I knew all the moves—did I do them perfectly, well, not quite, but now that I know it, we’ll be practicing it during rehearsals and it can be perfected. YEEEHAW!
As I said, the choreography for “Make Some Noise” is going to be a problem, that slappity go slap thing. Seems I wasn’t the only one having trouble with it, as I found out last night. And I felt as if I was the only one – nope, I wasn’t – and not to sound gleeful, geez that’s terrible, that others were messing up, but it sure made me feel better Haw haw!
“Miz Kathryn Miz Kathryn!”
“I tol’ you so. I tol’ you it all works out when you done worry over it. Huh.”
I guess it does.
“Now, I got a chicken’s neck to wrang. Too bad you can’t come on over to supper. I’m cooking Suzy-Q today. The speckledly one. She got one eye plucked out and t’other one is infected with the pus. Guess I be doing her a favor eating her this eve’ning. Yep, you be missing out on some good vituals.”
Dang. Yeah, uh, too bad…teehee…. thank gawd. And too bad you aren’t real, Clementine, or else I’d be right on over…haha…yeah…well….
“Who says I done be real. Huh. I’m as real as the wind. Huh.”
Say goodbye Clementine.
“G’bye, Clementine. Hehehe.”
Monday is choreography. Soon we’ll be adding the other music, the lighting, our costumes–all new stimuli to get used to. For, the time is coming fast to Opening Night. Good Lord! Opening Night – just the sound of that. An audience. DANG!
Theater word for the Day: Cross Fade
Lighting term: fading one lantern (or group of lanterns) up while fading another down.