Yesterday I saw something I never thought I’d see in my lifetime. What I saw in a restaurant yesterday was….a line at the men’s bathroom and not at the women’s! I stared. I sipped my vodka tonic with lime (they had no Ketel One! Can you believe it? Dang.) There was a man milling about, as if he wasn’t really waiting for the men’s room, as if it was a purely “Feminine” thing to be doing; waiting for the bathroom. He was close enough to our table in the back, not far from the restrooms (huhn) for me to say to him, “Well, thought I’d never see the day.” He smiled, had that “what do you mean? smile,” and I said, “A man. Waiting for the men’s restroom.” He laughed. Then, just as we were laughing, another man showed up, then another, and one more. I think my mouth dropped open at that point. The first man I spoke with glanced over at the others, smiled at me, shrugged, and we laughed. Another man watched us laughing, and then said, “Yeah, weird huh? Men waiting to use the restroom.” I snickered. He then said, “Now I know how you all feel.” I just shrugged, sipped my drink, then grinned.
I thought it funny how the men pretended they weren’t waiting on the men’s room, but instead looked all around. At the ceiling. At the floor. At the pretty waitress walking by. At their hands as if something was supposed to be held there but was lost. They looked everywhere but at that bathroom door, which finally opened. When the one inside (and guess who it was? My own GMR!) When he stepped out, he had the most comical look of surprise on his face. He sauntered over to our table by the window, while the next man in line nonchalantly strolled in, as if he hadn’t been waiting. The remaining men kind of secretly mini-stepped forward, as if they weren’t still waiting. GMR said, “Huhn.” I said, “Men waiting! On the restrooms!” He said, “Huhn.”
Meanwhile, one woman went into the women’s restroom. None waited. None! She was able to take her time without having to do the Hurry Up Dance so she wouldn’t keep the others waiting. Nope, she could take her sweet time; la tee dah!
I may never see this phenomenon again. (Unlike the post HERE.) But, folks, it did happen. And, it brought me a secret sense of satisfaction, I am sorry to say. But mostly, it just made me laugh.
This is off topic, completely. But, I had a thought. What if there are only a specific number of molecules that can make up the entire universe. What if one thing loses mass, then something else has to take on that mass.
So, if a planet becomes smaller, another planet must take on mass. If a cloud loses rain, the earth takes the rain. If an animal dies and decomposes, that mass is taken on by births of other animals. And! The thing I was thinking about: if a person loses weight, someone else has to take on that mass! So, if I lose five pounds, someone else must take my five pounds as a gain. If I gain five pounds, I take it from someone else’s mass.
All you hear is that obesity is a problem; but, at the same time, you also hear that Hollyweird types and runway models are way too thin. It’s the Mass Transfer thing! All those hundreds and hundreds of pounds lost by Hollyweird actors (and actors means men and women) and the runway models have had to transfer somewhere, so they transferred to regular old people. It’s the balancing of Mass. When something loses mass, something else has to take on that mass! Hmm, I wonder who took on the three pounds I just lost by being so damned busy lately I’ve not had time to eat as I should. Somewhere those three pounds swirled around and found a body to land on. I’m not sure if the mass has to go directly in my immediate vicinity—do our spousal units in residence take on each other’s Mass Transfers? I didn’t ask Good Old Good Man Roger if he gained three pounds. I wonder if it can transfer to animals? Did my dog gain three pounds? Or is it species to species only? Maybe those three pounds hovered in the air until it found where it wanted to go. Maybe someone I passed in the restaurant yesterday.
If I gain back those three pounds, is it my original three pounds and the person I passed it to loses the three pounds they gained? We bounce it back and forth? “No, it’s YOURS!” …”No! I don’t want it – you take it!” …”Stop it! I don’t want your damn three pounds!” back and forth it goes. Or maybe a pound goes to that person, a half to that one, pound and a half to this one, etc.