Quasars: A possible look into our Pasts . . . . The Deal Breaker(s) in Relationships-got yours?

black-hole-quasar-water-cloudQuasar is short for “quasi-stellar radio source.” They emit radio waves, as well as ultraviolet rays, infrared waves, x-rays, gamma rays. A quasar can be larger than our solar system. Dang! Quasars, the most distant objects, have enormous energy and are a trillion times brighter than our sun. Their energy comes from massive black holes at the center of the galaxy the quasar resides in. They’re bright enough to drown out the light of other stars. We can’t see them with our “naked” eye, even as bright as they are, because they are so far away—the energy from a quasar can take billions of years to reach our atmosphere. This could give scientists a peek into the early universe. A quasar may be like looking into the ancient past.

Think of this: the farther you go into space, the farther back in time you go. If we jumped into the lil log spaceship and were to go deeper and deeper into space, we’d eventually reach the beginning of time. Wrap your head around that for a moment!

One day, billions of years from now, our Milky Way Galaxy will collide with Andromeda Galaxy, and black holes will form a supermassive black hole. That supermassive black hole, munching up matter, will probably birth a quasar.

The video is someone’s interpretation of what a quasar may look and sound like.

If we did go deep into space, farther back in time, what would we see of ourselves? Would we see past Self make the same mistakes over and over again? Would we see our Self thinking that we were not making the same mistakes when we really are but only in a different context? We could take that intense Quasar light and shine it on our stumbles and foibles and use that to our advantage—to move forward in an aware way into healthy and happy lives, right? Right!

Many times people stumble into relationships willy nilly without giving a thought to what they really do want, or simply ignore and justify behaviors. They see warning signs and red flags but there’s that Hope that things “will just work out, somehow . . . .” And sometimes things do work out!

circling the drain . . . glub, glub, glub.

circling the drain . . . glub, glub, glub.

Sometimes the unlikeliest of couples are together for many many years and they make it work. Hoorah! I love those Exception couples.  But some find themselves in and out of partnerships as if in some kind of weird sad square dance: do si do swing your pahd’nuhs round and round! WHEEEEEEEEE! Ooops, fell on my ass, again. Oh well! Here comes another pahd’nuh! WHEEEEE-aw, shit—oh well, here comes another . . . .

I’ve “been there done that” on many things I may write about on this blog, so don’t think I’m feeling all smug in my lil log spaceship, y’all! I do know this: better to be lonely alone than to be lonely while in an unhappy relationship that isn’t right for you.

Perhaps it’s time to be more mindful of our choices? To consider that entering into a relationship isn’t some flippant event we should stumble willy nilly into—people can be hurt in so many different ways—but instead something we make with our consciousness on full alert.

Ha! *personal trainer evil eye!*

Ha! *personal trainer evil eye!*

There are those who make long detailed “lists” of what they want, or do not want, from a partner: some physical feature, money made or what one does for a living, what someone drives or where they live, kind of lifestyle lived, etc etc etc. Perhaps in dating and future relationships, being mindful of what you want while keeping your eyes and hearts open to adventure or someone “different” is less limiting than long detailed lists. That said, if you want children and your potential partner does not? That’s a Big Issue. If you are a yoga-pilates-daily runner vegan and your potential partner eats bacon cheeseburgers every day while lolling on the sofa. That’s a Big Issue. Those items may be up for discussion. Or, they may be non-negotiable.

Whether you make a list, or have never considered one, I am a firm believer in: The Deal Breaker.

Deal Breakers are what you absolutely positively cannot, and absolutely should not!, live with. There is no going back. If the Deal Breaker is broken, the relationship is over.

My savvy friends, think carefully about your Deal Breaker(s). Once your partner is aware of your adamant declaration and they Break The Deal, and you then say “Well, I’ll let it go this time! But do that again and you are out!” then you have not only lost your Self-respect, but you have lost the

Why did this bird cross the road? To get away from the Deal Breaker!

Why did this bird cross the road? To get away from the Deal Breaker!

respect of the person who is engaging in the Deal Breaker Behavior—I’ll take that further: if your partner respected you, they would not engage in the Deal Breaker Behavior in the first place. Because that Deal Breaker is Very Very Very Important to you—it is what makes you feel safe and respected and loved, and so it should be as valuable to your partner.

If the list mounts and grows, then those are not Deal Breakers—those are wishes and desires and what you think you want. Deal Breakers are separate from the “this is what I would like to have in a relationship.”

You can keep your Deal Breaker(s) to yourself while you are dating, but if you see a Red Flag, then beware. If you are heading into a relationship then perhaps at its beginning is the time to talk about your Deal Breakers—both of you.

Do you know your Deal Breaker(s)? I bet you do. I bet some of you have just ignored them, or justified the Deal Breaking Behavior. Haven’t you?

Deal Breakers are the Hard Ass Event. You have to be strong and you have to be brave. You have to walk away. You must. So use your Deal Breakers wisely, my friends. They are powerful. They are the End. They are our Milky Way Galaxy ramming into Andromeda Galaxy, and KABOOMO! we are Done.


Deanie Gallimore – you are the ‘winner’ of the drawing for the Kat’s Choice give-away! Facebook message me your mailing address.

Next drawing will be announced when I’m ready – ha! Who is driving this spaceship? Me~!


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4 thoughts on “Quasars: A possible look into our Pasts . . . . The Deal Breaker(s) in Relationships-got yours?

  1. I was just talking about relationships today with a new friend, and I mentioned that husband #2 was not the right guy, but I married him anyway. There were plenty of deal breakers throughout the relationship, but I was still of a mind that I needed a man to be happy. How wrong I was! If you experience a deal breaker, walk away.

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