Quasars: A possible look into our Pasts . . . . The Deal Breaker(s) in Relationships-got yours?

black-hole-quasar-water-cloudQuasar is short for “quasi-stellar radio source.” They emit radio waves, as well as ultraviolet rays, infrared waves, x-rays, gamma rays. A quasar can be larger than our solar system. Dang! Quasars, the most distant objects, have enormous energy and are a trillion times brighter than our sun. Their energy comes from massive black holes at the center of the galaxy the quasar resides in. They’re bright enough to drown out the light of other stars. We can’t see them with our “naked” eye, even as bright as they are, because they are so far away—the energy from a quasar can take billions of years to reach our atmosphere. This could give scientists a peek into the early universe. A quasar may be like looking into the ancient past.

Think of this: the farther you go into space, the farther back in time you go. If we jumped into the lil log spaceship and were to go deeper and deeper into space, we’d eventually reach the beginning of time. Wrap your head around that for a moment!

One day, billions of years from now, our Milky Way Galaxy will collide with Andromeda Galaxy, and black holes will form a supermassive black hole. That supermassive black hole, munching up matter, will probably birth a quasar.

The video is someone’s interpretation of what a quasar may look and sound like.

If we did go deep into space, farther back in time, what would we see of ourselves? Would we see past Self make the same mistakes over and over again? Would we see our Self thinking that we were not making the same mistakes when we really are but only in a different context? We could take that intense Quasar light and shine it on our stumbles and foibles and use that to our advantage—to move forward in an aware way into healthy and happy lives, right? Right!

Many times people stumble into relationships willy nilly without giving a thought to what they really do want, or simply ignore and justify behaviors. They see warning signs and red flags but there’s that Hope that things “will just work out, somehow . . . .” And sometimes things do work out!

circling the drain . . . glub, glub, glub.

circling the drain . . . glub, glub, glub.

Sometimes the unlikeliest of couples are together for many many years and they make it work. Hoorah! I love those Exception couples.  But some find themselves in and out of partnerships as if in some kind of weird sad square dance: do si do swing your pahd’nuhs round and round! WHEEEEEEEEE! Ooops, fell on my ass, again. Oh well! Here comes another pahd’nuh! WHEEEEE-aw, shit—oh well, here comes another . . . .

I’ve “been there done that” on many things I may write about on this blog, so don’t think I’m feeling all smug in my lil log spaceship, y’all! I do know this: better to be lonely alone than to be lonely while in an unhappy relationship that isn’t right for you.

Perhaps it’s time to be more mindful of our choices? To consider that entering into a relationship isn’t some flippant event we should stumble willy nilly into—people can be hurt in so many different ways—but instead something we make with our consciousness on full alert.

Ha! *personal trainer evil eye!*

Ha! *personal trainer evil eye!*

There are those who make long detailed “lists” of what they want, or do not want, from a partner: some physical feature, money made or what one does for a living, what someone drives or where they live, kind of lifestyle lived, etc etc etc. Perhaps in dating and future relationships, being mindful of what you want while keeping your eyes and hearts open to adventure or someone “different” is less limiting than long detailed lists. That said, if you want children and your potential partner does not? That’s a Big Issue. If you are a yoga-pilates-daily runner vegan and your potential partner eats bacon cheeseburgers every day while lolling on the sofa. That’s a Big Issue. Those items may be up for discussion. Or, they may be non-negotiable.

Whether you make a list, or have never considered one, I am a firm believer in: The Deal Breaker.

Deal Breakers are what you absolutely positively cannot, and absolutely should not!, live with. There is no going back. If the Deal Breaker is broken, the relationship is over.

My savvy friends, think carefully about your Deal Breaker(s). Once your partner is aware of your adamant declaration and they Break The Deal, and you then say “Well, I’ll let it go this time! But do that again and you are out!” then you have not only lost your Self-respect, but you have lost the

Why did this bird cross the road? To get away from the Deal Breaker!

Why did this bird cross the road? To get away from the Deal Breaker!

respect of the person who is engaging in the Deal Breaker Behavior—I’ll take that further: if your partner respected you, they would not engage in the Deal Breaker Behavior in the first place. Because that Deal Breaker is Very Very Very Important to you—it is what makes you feel safe and respected and loved, and so it should be as valuable to your partner.

If the list mounts and grows, then those are not Deal Breakers—those are wishes and desires and what you think you want. Deal Breakers are separate from the “this is what I would like to have in a relationship.”

You can keep your Deal Breaker(s) to yourself while you are dating, but if you see a Red Flag, then beware. If you are heading into a relationship then perhaps at its beginning is the time to talk about your Deal Breakers—both of you.

Do you know your Deal Breaker(s)? I bet you do. I bet some of you have just ignored them, or justified the Deal Breaking Behavior. Haven’t you?

Deal Breakers are the Hard Ass Event. You have to be strong and you have to be brave. You have to walk away. You must. So use your Deal Breakers wisely, my friends. They are powerful. They are the End. They are our Milky Way Galaxy ramming into Andromeda Galaxy, and KABOOMO! we are Done.

Deanie Gallimore – you are the ‘winner’ of the drawing for the Kat’s Choice give-away! Facebook message me your mailing address.

Next drawing will be announced when I’m ready – ha! Who is driving this spaceship? Me~!

1964980_10152466287074176_8369086502746553258_nIf you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to my 51j6n1OihJL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-v3-big,TopRight,0,-55_SX278_SY278_PIkin4,BottomRight,1,22_AA300_SH20_OU01_Amazon Page. I appreciate your support!

1461250_496657083765127_1387255473_nAnd I thank you, my readers.



Venus’s Long Moonless Day & Relationship/Dating Series Post 1: Grieve First, then Find What’s Next in Your Story

Ah Venus. What more appropriate planet in our Galaxy to kick off this series on dating and venusrelationships, or lack thereof, since this planet is named after the Roman goddess of love and beauty?  Right? Uh huh.

The second planet from the Sun, Venus is the second brightest object after Earth’s Moon. It has a similar size and mass to Earth, so they are often called “Sister Planets.”  Like Uranus that I spoke about in the previous post below, Venus rotates in a retrograde fashion, in the opposite direction to the sun. It has no satellites, meaning no moon! Yes, Venus is not in a relationship with any satellite. It has no co-dependent, symbiotic-like thing hanging around it to keep it company as Earth has Moon. And Venus seems to be doing just fine on its own in its own ironic way.

Venus is the hottest planet in our solar system with temperatures of over 870 degrees Fahrenheit—its atmosphere is made of carbon dioxide and extreme greenhouse effect heats up its surface. This is well hot enough to melt lead, people.

A weird little quirk about Venus is that a day on Venus, at 243 Earth days, lasts longer than its year, which is 224.7 days. A 243-day day. Well Dang!

If you weighed 115 pounds on Earth, you’d weigh 104.3 on Venus. If your birthday was today, August 5, and we use the year 1970 again, you would be 74.7 years old, and your next birthday would be September 24, 2016.

It’s telling that a planet so known for its symbol of love and beauty is also uninhabitable, with long DSC09985long long long uber windy searing hot unbreathable days, and not even a Moon to gaze up at. Double Dang.

I could gaze longingly out the windows of the Lil Log Spaceship as I skirt around a symbol of love and beauty before jetting off to somewhere safe. Or, I could figure out how to completely alter myself so I could inhabit this hot uninhabitable planet.

Or, I could spend some time alone in the Galaxy until I figure out: What do you really really want, Kat? Who are you so you can know who you want in your life?

And most important:  What’s next in your own life story, Kat? Don’t you want to ask yourself that, too? And then find out?

Because if we become involved with someone too soon after being involved with someone else, we risk not finding out what’s next in our own stories but instead once again become entangled in someone else’s story.

So if I want to visit Venus, I will be equipped with the materials I need to explore its surface on my own terms. And if I cannot figure that out, I won’t go until I do.

(And nowhere in this post am I referring to the “Men are from Mars; Women from Venus” stuff—my post here has nothing to do with that.)

To start off this series on dating and relationships, I must tell you that being Lonely isn’t the end of the world. Sure we can melt on Venus, or be blown by raging winds, or slog through a 243-long day, but if we have to go there alone to discover what’s next in our stories, then we survive it. Because we must. Because we should. Because being alone is NECESSARY for us to move on and forward and tally ho!

If you are fresh out of a relationship and immediately jump into dating, how is that healthy? Where is the retrospective?  Where is the respect for that previous relationship—and if there is no respect, photothen why not? Where is the grieving period? Yes, grieving period. You are experiencing the death of something. I don’t care if you are telling me, “But it was a terrible relationship! We crashed on Venus and melted to smithereens!” If you were in a relationship, you must grieve its end. Even if only to grieve the “Idea” of that relationship.

If you were in a relationship that often made you happy, you must grieve the companionship, the intimacy, the veritable Two that becomes One. If you were in a relationship that was often stormy and chaotic, you must still grieve the moments of exciting madness.

If you felt you were a better person in this relationship than without it, then your grieving will be acutely lonely and sad. If you felt you became someone unrecognizable—someone you no longer wanted to be—in a relationship, you still must grieve, even if you are grieving over how something that seemingly held such promise ended with such messy crapitude.

I don’t care if you tell me you hate the person you were with and would cheerfully sock them in their big fat nose—if you do not deal with the grief to the end of a relationship, the death of something, and you rush headlong into dating, or worse into another relationship, you are setting yourself up for a world—a galaxy—of troubles. Yes yes yes, there are exceptions to every Rule in Life, but those exceptions are just that: Exceptions. Exceptions are rare.

Exceptions sure hurl us into a lot of trouble, don’t they? How many times do we hear, “So and so did this and such and it worked out perfectly! They’ve been together 5 million Venus days and each day is better than the last! Oohhhh, I want that! If they have it, there’s a chance I can, too! Ohhh!” Yeah. Trouble. Because sometimes those Exceptions lead to Expectations that lead to Justifications that lead to Oh Shit What Have I Done? And yes, okay, sometimes they can lead us to magical wonderlands in a galaxy far far away.

You willing to take that risk with what’s next in your story?

Do please believe me that taking time to lick your wounds and consider just what happened to you and to your partner is imperative for the health of your next relationship—if you decide ever to go there again! Ha! And you will. One day. And that One Day should be after you are strong and healthy. It should be after you consider YOUR OWN role in the “Just what happened here” planet.

Nope, I am closing my ears to your saying, “But my partner was a train wreck! He/She was *fill in blank with putritude*!” Well, even if you only have to answer to my, “Then why were you with them? What attracted you to the putritude train wreck?” Because as adults we do all make our own choices, don’t we? You can tell yourselves you were fooled, or blind with love, or blind with lust, or unaware, or lied to, or whatever justification you need to feel better about yourself, but reality is that there were two people in that relationship and neither one of you is was were perfect. Yes yes yes I understand there are some people who are Bad News and good decent people are swept away by events and personalities that surprise and fool and trick—another Exception. If that happens, then the healthy person quickly extracts themselves from that situation, right? Right! If not, then why not?

If the partnership had beautiful, and mind-blowing, moments, then the grieving and retrospective will be fraught with entanglements. Because you’ll miss those things, and you’ll want to feel them 3BDA8B33-0566-4847-B345-5FF7128F7FC2again, and you’ll want to feel them again NOW NOW NOW! I urge you to stop. Take a moment. Take bunches and oodles and millions of moments. Take some deep breaths. Learn to live alone for a while. Learn what it feels like to rely on You and You Only. Learn to be independent. Become strong. Become healthy. Find out What is Next in Your Story, without entangling yourself in someone else’s story—until it is Time.

Now, of course you want the support of your trusted friend(s)—who doesn’t? But even they can only help you so far as you are willing to help yourself.

Consider the reasons you were with your previous partner and then extract what worked about it—file that away for future reference. Then consider what did not work about it, extract that, and file that away in another file for your future reference. Be brutally honest with yourself. We humans have a funny way of denying reality and focusing only on what we want to hear/believe/see that feels comfy cozy to us. You must be so brutally honest with yourself that it hurts—deeply hurts—to consider. And I don’t mean just about your previous partner, but brutally honest about yourself, too. Perhaps you really did do all you could do and you tried with all your big beautiful heart, but, does that mean you did not have some responsibility in the demise of your partnership? Only until you are brutally honest will you flesh out what’s really going on in the head and heart and desires of You.

Though we won’t talk about No 9 right now, will we?

The good, the bad, and the ugly should be examined.

Diving headlong into another relationship before you’ve grieved the last one, before you’ve extracted the “Whys Hows Whens Wheres” of it all, will set you up either to look for what you are missing from the last partnership, or set you off to find something/someone completely different/opposite. Neither one of those missions is healthy, strong, independent-thinking. When you are ready to date again, you should be dating not with the idea of finding someone to replace the other person. Or finding someone to fill some hole in you. Or finding someone who will make you feel different from the last person. Or finding some warm body to keep you company.

Being with someone just so you are not alone is exactly the wrong reason to be with someone! It’s a sucky shitty reason. And it is certainly a Not Fair reason to the people you involve yourself with.

My last relationship was very intoxicating. And I grieved it. Not for days or weeks. I grieved for months. I stopped telling myself, “I should be over this. I should this. I should that.” Instead, I let myself feel all the horrible sad feelings. The tender moment feelings. The powerful intimate moment feelings. I let myself feel rage, too. Depression. Anxiety. Loneliness. Fear. I allowed myself to feel all the terrible awful things that we want to deny. Because we try to Feel Good all the time. article-2302364-00570A6100000258-460_634x430Because we are told to Suck It Up. Because we are told to Get Out There Again! Because we are told strength means something different from what it really does mean: Strength means we must first feel weak and then build ourselves up again. Strength means facing all the shitty crappyness and feeling all the shitty crappyness without denying its existence so hard that we shove it into the Black Hole where we think it’ll disappear forever. Oh, it’ll find its way back up in some quasar supernova explosion—and in the most unexpected and un-wanted moments and times of our lives. It’ll find its way to you when you think you are happy again because you want to be HAPPY! so bad you won’t allow yourself any discomfort. *Shaking my head no*

There were many things I missed about Being Two. My Lil Log Spaceship became so quiet I could hear my own anxiety-ridden heartbeat. I wandered about as a ghost would, sad, lonely, scared. Suddenly, I had to figure out everything on my own. Suddenly, all the bills were mine. Suddenly, there was no sex, no intimacy, no kiss, no touch. Suddenly, there was no one to talk to. Suddenly, I ate alone, slept alone, did every single thing alone. I grieved. I assessed. I contemplated.

But, my friends, I did not jump out there and start dating just to fill up a hole left by someone else. And I’m still not dating. And I will not date until I know I am Ready. And by Ready I mean when I am completely strong again; when I feel like Myself again—myself as a whole independent mind and body. I will know when I get there and I will not rush this. I cannot. I should not. And neither should you.

The other day I looked into the mirror and thought, “There you are.” Because I am discovering myself again. Yes, I am Lonely Woman, but this Lonely Woman life is exactly what I need to find Me ipod photos 081again. And once I am ready to date again, I will make choices that are healthy and strong. And the men I date will be healthy and strong. If they are not, then I want to be able to know that quickly so I’m outta there. You must be a healthy and strong person yourself so you can recognize one who matches you in strength and independence. You must find Respect. So you find Self Respect first.

So, my dear ones, though I am not dating right now, I have dated in the past. And, I have been talking to, and listening to, people who are or were dating, and in my next post in this series, I am going to explore some Dating Do’s and Don’t’s. Some of these were real eye openers—just when you think people would have common sense, and decency, and showers (haha!), well, they do not! Ha!

My next give away is Kat’s Choice. That means I get to randomly choose something to send to you. Yup, you just have to trust me . . . and of course you can! Can too! I’ll choose the names to draw from comments, “likes,” and from FB comments/likes, as well. Thank you!

No repairs or whatever today since this post ran a little long, but next week I’ll have more on simple repairs/tools, etc.

1964980_10152466287074176_8369086502746553258_nIf you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to my 51j6n1OihJL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-v3-big,TopRight,0,-55_SX278_SY278_PIkin4,BottomRight,1,22_AA300_SH20_OU01_Amazon Page. I appreciate your support!

1461250_496657083765127_1387255473_nAnd I thank you, my readers.


Uranus: Rolling Retrograde Pale Blue Beauty & Simple Car Repairs 1-ohhhh!-1: YOU GOT THIS!

Uranus is the seventh planet from the sun and not visible to the naked eye. It’s an interesting and f96496501b29ea59d0cd2f06ad7bba09im-not-saying-its-cats-but-its-cats-thumbunique planet worthy of our attention. Don’t you feel that about yourself sometimes? Especially as a Lonely Woman, or Lonely Man? That you are no longer visible but you are unique and interesting and worthy of attention? You’ll hear, “Get yourself out there! Be around people!” But, it is exactly the “getting yourself out there” thing that is confusing and daunting and scary, isn’t it?

But I digress. Because I like to say/write: I digress.

Uranus’s axis is tilted at 97-98 degrees, so the planet rolls on its side for most of its rotation around our sunmain-qimg-86166fcd316a7716d4486a9e420e9a96. This rotation is called retrograde—opposite of Earth and other planets (besides Venus and Pluto, which also spin in a retrograde direction). In these retrograde planets you can imagine that the sun would rise in the west and set in the east. Though, Uranus is so tilted on its side that some of its orbit points its poles right at the sun so there’s 42 years of sunlight at one pole while the other is in complete darkness for 42 years—that sounds like my moods sometimes; hahaha! The 42 years of sunlight/darkness is during Uranus’s solstice; during the planet’s equinox it is a little more “normal” in its “seasons.”

It takes 84 years for Uranus to orbit the sun—Earth takes 365 days. Imagine that for your birthday I pick you up in my Lil Log Spaceship and take you to Uranus.  Let’s also imagine your birthday is today, July 16, and, let’s say you were born in 1970. If you were back on Earth you’d be 46 years old. But if you were with me on Uranus you’d only be 0.54–notice the decimal y’all!—and what would be your second birthday wouldn’t be until July 20, 2054! I bet you’d miss all the cake and ice cream and presents and would scurry on back to earth. As for me? Well: Pitiful Lonely Woman Alert!—my last birthday was spent—guess, no really, guess!—yeah: alone. Dang. So a birthday once a year or once every 84 years—hmmmmm, gotta think about that one. Like Charlie Brown says (and I don’t exactly quote): We don’t mind being alone and lonely so much, we just don’t want a holiday(or birthday) to emphasis it. Awwwwwwww!

On Uranus, a 115 pound person would weigh 102. Not a huge difference like some of the other celestial bodies—for example, a 115 pound person would weigh over 3000 pounds on the sun but only 19 pounds on the moon! I’m gonna have my cake and eat more of it too on the Moon.

uranusUranus is an Ice Giant planet. There’s an ice mantle that surrounds rock and more ice. Its atmosphere above consists of ammonia, water, and methane ice crystals—this gives it its gorgeous pastel blue color.

Now here is a weird thing: because of Uranus’s atmosphere, it is thought that it may rain diamonds! Imagine diamond-hail falling down on and around you. As well, It could be that there is a layer of liquid diamond. I’m not a diamond kind of woman, but I’d love to have me a big ole pretty jar of liquid diamond. Now I bet that would be interesting and beautiful. Dang! My precious.

Many people believe Saturn is the only planet with rings, but Uranus has rings too (so does Jupiter and Neptune). They are small rings made of dust and small boulders.

Neptune has 27 moons. Can you imagine looking up and seeing 27 moons? They were named after William Shakespeare and Alexander Pope characters—like Puck, Juliet, Ariel, Cupid, Miranda, Oberon, Caliban, etc. etc.

For more on Uranus, see this video below:

Some pronounce this planet Ur-ran-us and others Ur-anus. I admit I picked this planet today because I was saying “Your-Anus” in my head, and since I kicked ass yesterday, that was my reason. Yeah. Well. What can I say? Laugh. I have my own thought-processes.

And the reason I kicked ass is because I was able to make a couple of repairs on my car without any help—because there IS no help. When you are a Lonely Woman/Man, you are responsible for everything, and that includes car repairs and maintenance. And that’s what I want to talk to you about today, besides Uranus, that is! The more we can do on our own, the more kickass we feel. The more empowered we feel. Before I opened up that hood, I was worried about what those repairs were going to cost me, and where would the money come from? How much more can my groaning credit card take? I’d been putting it off, and it wasn’t safe to do that. I was tired of the anxiety over it.

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You are allowed to look pitiful if it’s your birthday and you are by yourself being a Charlie Brown. Just say’n

Stress . . . worry . . . obsesses . . . anxiety . . . or, open the danged ole hood and just Try It.

The repairs I made saved me a trip to a mechanic (other than the “check engine” light that I will talk about), and everything I did was completely FREE! I included a video (below).

These repairs were done on a 1998 Subaru Outback. Your car may vary. Refer to video below if you want to “see” what I’m talking about. And be careful about safety: Engine OFF; hood secured, and any other areas of safety necessary. Your car may be different from mine, so just be Smart about things.

Problem: One of your headlights is not working. It’s not the bulb, because either you’ve had that replaced, and/or you notice the light sometimes works.

Solution: I always keep my engine off! Open the hood, secure the hood safely. Now, look around at FullSizeRenderwhat appears to be connectors and connections leading to the headlight. Behind the bulb you’ll see wires connected to a “plug” –unplug this connector and make sure all the wires are secure. Press the wire connections in, brush/blow away any dirt and dust. Plug the connector back in. If you are lucky, as I was, the headlight will come on! Just be sure you are not forcing things—if it isn’t something easy to disconnect, maybe it’s not supposed to be disconnected!

Problem: Windshield wiper cleaner not working. No motor sounds; no water.

Solution: Again, engine off, look under your secured hood (safety always please!), and find your 064B5BE3-06C5-4A51-9BE8-A33E9221BAA0 (3)windshield wiper fluid container. Make sure first it has fluid. Then look for connectors/connections-wiring leading to the fluid container. Check the wires and connections—I like to press them, push them in, move wires out of the way so they don’t hang up on something. Press on the connectors to make sure they are secured. Sometimes it’s just a loose wire or connections rather than a bad part!

If you have motor sounds but no water comes out to clean your windshield, then look for the small tube that goes from the windshield fluid container up to your hood. In my case, that black rubber tube coming from the windshield wiper fluid container was disconnected from the white plastic connector on the hood. I simply connected the two, turned on my wiper cleaner, and VOILA! Done!

Problem: “Check Engine” light suddenly comes on. Right after I drove my car after these repairs, my check engine light came on. This has never happened before and I was about to panic, but I knew it had to do with something I’d just done. I drove right to a local mechanic (in this case Waynesville Tire—and they were awesome). I told them the repairs I’d done.

Solution: They hooked up a device and all they ended up having to do was put in a code to turn off the check engine light indicator. The mechanic explained that some things will cause that sensor to go off and indicate a check engine light when there is nothing wrong with the engine. We figured that when all that water sprayed in my engine from that loose tube, it somehow caused the sensor to go off. It cost me nothing. So “check engine” doesn’t always mean something bad or catastrophic. If your check engine light comes on, don’t let someone scare you in to some huge repair. Take your car to someone you trust and ask them to try putting in the code to turn off that check engine light. If it continues to come on, then you may have something to address. However, in my case, that was the solution!

Next give-away is next post. And I draw from people who’ve “liked” or commented (here or on the post that shows up on my Facebook Page) from the last drawing until now, so more people are included and it makes it more fun. So on the posts I don’t have a give away, your name still goes “in the hat” for the next drawing.  

During the next few posts, I’m going to delve into the area of – gasp – Dating! Or Not Dating, as the case may, or should, or could be. Stay tuned.


1964980_10152466287074176_8369086502746553258_nIf you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to my 51j6n1OihJL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-v3-big,TopRight,0,-55_SX278_SY278_PIkin4,BottomRight,1,22_AA300_SH20_OU01_Amazon Page. I appreciate your support!

1461250_496657083765127_1387255473_nAnd I thank you, my readers.

Earth’s “Near Companion,” Vomitus-Appearing Suppers, Tip for Dirty Oven Doors

It seems that Earth has a mini Moon (it’s not really a moon but I like to think it is) that’s been around for about a hundred years. Only no one Asteroid-2016HO3-e1466075012630knew it until recently. This little asteroid has been circling round Earth for a long time, and will stick around for a much longer time—centuries maybe.

Scientists call this moon a “near-Earth companion.” Asteroid 2016 HO3 orbits the sun but stays this constant Earth companion. It never strays far away. There was once another asteroid that followed for a while, but it went away—buh-bye. If I may personify for a moment: I wonder if Moon grieved that companion? If space seemed more spacier after that moon was gone.

But this little moon is “. . . much more locked onto us.”

If the asteroid drifts ahead or behind or too far away forward or backward, the Earth uses its strong gravitational force to hold tight to the asteroid so it can’t or won’t wander away too far.

It also stops the little moon from becoming too close.

A PRODUCT PICTURE, DOORMAT, GO AWAY, COME BACK WITH CHOCOLATE 2_001Ah. There it is. The irony. The contradictory contrariness of relationships.

Andrew Griffin in a science news article (<click to read) writes, “In effect, this small asteroid is caught in a little dance with Earth.” Oh the dizzying dance.

Ah. It all sounds like Human Relationships, doesn’t it? Are you the little moon? The Earth? The Sun? Do you try to get away and are pulled back by the gravitational force of someone? Will you stick around for centuries, or go away as the other little moon did?

A “Near Companion”—that seems rather perfect to me. Not too close, not too far. And always with the knowing you could spiral off and away as the other asteroid did if things become too . . . too . . . permanent—whooosh! Buh-bye. Dang. I pitiful myself.

If you are your own companion, out there as Moon seemed to be before little moon was

This is the lighter sweeter frosting

The best chocolate cake I have EVER made for someone special – contact me if you want the recipe.

discovered, you must find ways to navigate the universe as Lonely You. One of those things is the obtaining of and cooking of (or not cooking of) and eating of food. Today I’ll talk about the preparing and eating of Alone Fooding.

When I pop out from my lil log spaceship for supplies, I try not to be resentful of the money and time it takes to gather and pay for food. I’m tempted to grab the easiest most processed crap-a-doodle-doo-doo because cooking alone and eating alone while not always horrid can be rather boring and uninspired. You can’t cook something delicious and then have someone say, “Omg! This is so delicious! You are amazing!” Or on the other hand, you cannot say that to the person who just prepared you something amazing. Dang.

But since I am a healthy woman—I was a personal trainer for many years—and I know what I am to do to keep my body and mind strong, I try to prepare healthy food most of the time. Though I do admit that I am a sucker for those cheap-ass Mrs. Callender’s chicken pot pies—add a salad, and there you go! And always cook them in the oven, not the microwave or else they aren’t as good. I also sprinkle Parmesan cheese, or feta, or blue cheese, on top of the pie when there’s about five minutes to go—it makes it seem a little more Home-Madey and gives it a nice fatty-yummyness. Once I stirred in brown rice—nah, took away the pot-pie-ed-ness of it all.

strawberry salad 2 - Copy

The last of the peanuts at the bottom of the jar. Strawberries that needed to be eaten. Last of the yogurt in the bottom of the container-deli mustard-olive oil-honey balsamic vinegar dressing

strawberry salad - Copy

Sometimes I put chicken on my salads, but sometimes I use vegetarian meat replacement – like this chickpea and spinach patty.

I do not like to waste food—not that I ever did before, but even more so now with a tight budget of One, I want to purchase and prepare and eat only what I am able to, and waste not want not as the old cliché goes—a cliché becomes a cliché for a reason, y’all! So this often has me preparing strange conglomerates of ingredients. It often has me throwing bits and pieces into a stir-fry or salad and then just shoving the mess in my mouth and chewing and swallowing until I am done.

I’ve thrown fruit on salad, and the “dressing” is often only an infused vinegar and a little olive oil, but sometimes I will be, um, “creative” and stir together yogurt, honey-mustard or other kind of mustard, pepper and salt, whisk that together, and though it looks like vomitus, it’s rather tasty.

raspberry salad - Copy

Vegetarian “‘fried’ chicken” patty, shaved parm, peanuts, raspberries I need to eat quickly, olive oil, and pomegranate-infused vinegar

Salads are a good way to have a summer cool meal, but make sure you have some protein on there. I add nuts, seeds, and often I use vegetarian “meat” replacement, or real meat, or eggs. Cheese and the olive oil also adds some fat and flavor. I’m not a crouton kind of person but sometimes I’ll eat my salad with tortillas, and rarely but occasionally crackers. I’ve even tossed the last of the bag of Dorito-dust on my salad—though I very rarely purchase empty-caloried chips and crackers.




vomit food

Vomitus on the plate – but it was tasty! I promise! Brown rice from the freezer, bell-pepper from the freezer, seared chicken that I didn’t burn!, green beans that needed to be eaten, spices like Curry, parm on top. As for the chicken – I purchase chicken tenders and freeze each one separately– I only eat one tender-not a big meat eater. I also squeezed a half of a grapefruit into it because it needed to be eaten that day!

Sometimes the food looks appetizing and yummy, and sometimes this Experimentation means the food looks like dawg vomit. I threw into this stir fry some raspberries that were just at the edge—one more day and they’d be too mushy to eat. And I ate it with gusto!, because: waste not want not! Really, it was rather tasty! I promise.

I cook up a big pot of brown rice—brown rice is better for you. Yes it is! Suck it up and eat it!—and portion it out in individual freezer-safe containers so I’ll have brown rice on hand. You can add it to canned soups so they’ll be more nutritious, but not to Mrs. Callender’s pot pies—no no! Or to the stir fry. Or beans and rice. Sometimes I’ll throw the brown rice in a skillet and then add a couple of eggs and stir that around—quick protein—wheee!

A quick “stir-fry” idea is: add a little olive oil to a skillet, and at this point if you are using chicken or other meat you want to sear and cook that now; otherwise, if the meat is cooked or you are going “vegetarian,” toss in bell-pepper (I purchase bell peppers and immediately wash and slice them up and store them in the freezer—they freeze very well), onion and garlic if you like it (I also freeze my chopped onions, but I purchase the jar of minced garlic—just works better for me), and sauté this until the peppers are a bit “wilted” but still have a little crunch (or not, for if you are like me, you half burn them because you become distracted—ungh!). Add in the brown rice, meat or fake meat if you want, and any seasonings you like, (I also squeezed half a grapefruit I needed to eat), and DONE! Voila! Dinner in a flash!

yogurt oats2

Instant or not instant oatmeal with no sugar added, low sugar plain yogurt, dried fruit, milk or water, honey, refrigerate overnight

Instant or not instant oatmeal with no sugar added, low sugar plain yogurt, dried fruit, milk or water, honey, refrigerate overnight

vomit oats

Ugh. What’d I do this time? Bleah – vomit. But I ate it.

One night I threw together oatmeal, yogurt, a little cream and water, dried fruit, cinnamon, honey, stirred, and refrigerated overnight and had a nutritious breakfast before my hike. It was pretty danged good. But the next time, it turned out a gloopy gloppy pasty mess—and I ate it for supper while I worked on an editing job, and for dessert I had a peanut butter and jam sandwich—urp. Waste not want not.


corn burnt tortilla

Gorgonzola cheese sprinkled over corn tortillas, broiled in the oven, and then drizzled with honey. Had I not burnt them, they’d have been perfect. But I ate em up. That’s canned soup on the side that I added some of my brown rice from the freezer to.

I have really great “palate” instincts—I have been told I’m good at flavors, mixing flavors, finding unique and tasty flavors. I have the ability to be a Good Cook. But I am not. I often burn things because I’m in a hurry and turn up the heat too high, or become distracted by a shiny thing. I will start out with a yummy thought like these gorgonzola cheese sprinkled on top of corn tortillas with a drizzle of honey: what would have been delicious is instead burnt, but I ate them anyway *see want not waste not.* Not bad—urpity.

You know what the difference is between a good cook and someone who cooks? Patience and Love. I have neither but especially I do not when I am not a Near Companion to anyone. When I’m the asteroid who flew off and away into the galaxy or beyond, I Throw Shit Together and Hope for the Best. Sometimes it turns out fabulous, and other times I have Dawg Vomitus or Gloopy Glopped Messes or Burnt Tortillas or eat Mrs. Callenders pot pies. Mostly, I am bored. Bored. Bored. Bored. And when I am Bored, I experiment, and when I experiment, I have to eat what I prepared, even if it sucks.

I will tell you this: do not eat over the sink or even while working (though sometimes it must be done) or out of the pot! No no! Prepare your gloppy gloop or your burnt food or your surprisingly tasty dawg vomitus and ladle/spoon/fork it onto a plate or bowl and grab your silverware and a napkin and Eat Civilized, my friends. Eat Civilized.


Grind your own spice mixes! A small hand-cranked coffee grinder works well.

By the way—I took this coffee grinder and instead use it to grind pepper, or salt. And I add things to the mix. Even coffee! Coffee salts, coffee peppers—really quite good. If you are by yourself, you don’t have to worry, because if you mess it up, no one will know, right? Right!

So, my good friends—what do you prepare for a One? Or a Near Companion? How do you navigate your kitchen? How do you shop for food for one so you don’t “waste not want not?” I need ideas, recipes, thoughts!


Update on my post below about Alcohol: I had nothing to be concerned about after all! I am happy to report that I’ve not missed my daily fancy craft beer or my wine one bit. I thought I would. I worried I would. I was terrified I would. But, I do not. Never looked back. Feel great. Lost a couple of bloaty pounds by not imbibing. It seemed it was more a habit and boredom than anything else. This proves something important to me. I will continue not to Drink Alone, for I think that is best. But I am very happy and optimistic that I can return to my many many years of Social Drinking. Can I get a WHOOHOO! Y’all!


dirty oven door

Dirty Oven Window

This worked!


Hot Water – Paper Towels – Soak

salt door - Copy

Salt – scrub

clean door

Voila! One more time and it should be perfect!






TIP OF THE DAY! I have a self-cleaning oven and it works great for the oven
part, but my glass door always looked gross. I’ve scrubbed to no avail.

Enter Ask Heloise –  I’ll need to repeat it one more time but it worked!

Eleven years of frustration remedied in about 20 minutes. Hot Dang! Open oven door and carefully poor water you’ve boiled (I was boiling eggs so I used that water-ha!). Be careful! Lay paper towels over the hot water and let soak 5-10 minutes, adding a little more hot water about halfway through. I went the entire 10 minutes. Wipe up the water. Cover the window with salt, and then scrub. Wipe up the mess with a damp cloth. Dry. Though she didn’t say to, I then used a Clorox Wipe to shine it and then a paper towel to buff. Try it!


Winner of the Coffee Drawing is: Karen Anderson (<click to her blog)!

Karen, please contact me via email or FACEBOOK or in the comments here.

Also note that in the future I will be adding names to the drawing from any comments or “likes” not only here on my blog but on Facebook as well.

Next drawing is for something you can’t buy at a store. Details later

1964980_10152466287074176_8369086502746553258_nIf you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to my 51j6n1OihJL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-v3-big,TopRight,0,-55_SX278_SY278_PIkin4,BottomRight,1,22_AA300_SH20_OU01_Amazon Page. I appreciate your support!

1461250_496657083765127_1387255473_nAnd I thank you, my readers.

Alcohol Clouds in Space, and the Sneaky Bad Sucky Friend called Alcohol.

There is a big cloud of alcohol in space many many light years away. Larger than our solar system. As well, in our Milky Way Galaxy, at Sagittarius B2,  is a vast alcohol cloud that it is thought by alcohol and womenscientists that it tastes a bit like raspberries and smells like rum. Alcohol is an organic compound made up of hydrogen, carbon, and oxygen. For such a simple molecule, it holds great power. Consider that we are made up of four main elements: hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, and carbon. So, alcohol—building block of life? Ironic isn’t it? Since alcohol often tears down lives.

You can read more about Alcohol In Space by clicking.

So we steer towards that alcohol cloud, safely park where we won’t have to drive again, and stick a big straw out of the Little Log Spaceship to have us a big ole raspberry-flavored rum drink party. Wheeeeee! Of course we can’t drink the alcohol in space—it’s full of poisons. But isn’t the alcohol we do drink a poison? Poison to our minds, bodies, families, friends, lovers, loved ones. If it is abused.

If it is abused. Again—if it is abused.

Now comes the hard part. I feel anxious even as I begin to write it publicly.

Last night I parked the Lil Log Spaceship, for I have a hard and fast rule I have never strayed from: no drinking and driving, and I drank too much. I did it with purpose. Nothing good ever comes out of saying, “Fuck it.” Once you utter those words, you are giving yourself permission to act like an idiot, an ass, or to be hurtful, or reckless, or stupid, silly, childish.

While I drank, I noted with distant fascination that I can hold more alcohol than I used to be able to. That somehow over the last year or so, I’ve built up a tolerance—one or two glasses of wine, or a bottle of beer, at a time. While the grownup rational side of my brain thought, “What are you doing? This isn’t healthy!” The “Fuck it” part of my brain laughed gleefully and went on social media and thought how witty and funny I was being because my inhibitions were released all willy nilly. A party of one in the Lonely Woman’s Galaxy slurping up the alcohol gas cloud at Sagittarius B2.

There was a time when I drank socially. Other than my mad-wild-partying teen years, I have not since then been a big drinker. There’s alcoholism in my family—my father stayed sober 50 years but his years of drinking took a heavy toll on his life and loved ones, and very small children—of which I was one.

Until last night, I never considered that alcohol had suddenly, sneakily, insidiously, wormed its way into my life as a Bad Friend, a very bad sucky friend who pretends they only want to be your friend and all the while they are sucking the life out of you and leading you down Bad Decision Making paths. Why, I told myself, I only drink a glass of wine or drink a beer every so often—though “every so often” began to mean almost every day. I told myself: “I don’t get drunk!” Though, last night I did, and I wasn’t sick or dizzy and I didn’t wake with a hangover—this sounds great, but it is not great. It means I have built a tolerance. It means my body and my brain are growing used to me poisoning myself.

But consider that most evenings I do not over-drink. I have one, and on occasion two drinks. In the big scheme of things that’s not so bad, right? Maybe not.


Until you look at your face in the mirror the morning after you drank too much and acted like an ass and begin taking stock of how you are using alcohol to cope with the anxiety, and with the loneliness, and with the stress. You are using alcohol to numb the fact that you are not writing and writer's blodkathat has made you unhappy so you drink so you don’t feel unhappy but then you act like a ridiculous ass and that makes you more unhappy—and more anxious—and more alone. And the big ole ferris wheel of horror goes round and round and round and round and round. If you are looking up from below as the riders whizz by, you see faces lit up with terrified glee—a few gripping the bars and begging to be let off. You see yourself and you are not having fun.

You again consider that the thought you had while slamming down that alcohol last night is a thought you’ve had before over the last few months—the: “Wow, always before I was unable to drink this much without being dizzy and sick! Huh.” Oh well. La Tee Dah. Shrug! *Guzzle Guzzle Glub*

This morning, as I crawled out of bed after a sleepless night—for alcohol may put you to sleep right away but it will shake you the hell awake all night—and drank my coffee in the Little Log Spaceship, the realization and recognition of just where I am heading slapped me hard against my very hard peahead.

Here it is. The hard thing to say. What I didn’t see coming. What I don’t want to publicly admit but I am:

Alcohol is beginning to be a problem in my life. If I don’t jump off the Ferris Wheel of Horror, alcohol WILL be a problem in my life.

Alcohol is already a problem in my life.

I’ve watched as alcohol destroyed or near destroyed others’ lives and I always felt my Power and my Control over it. I was nearly arrogant in my complacent attitude towards alcohol despite my family history. Despite my own history from my teen years. Despite how lately my drinking to numb whatever I thought needed numbing was happening more often.

This Morning After I sit writing this and consider that if I am writing it, then I am living it. That if I am concerned over what seemed “innocent drinking” then it isn’t innocent. If I am sometimes an ass or out of control, or reckless, or maudlin, or giddy-then-depressed-then-regretful, then it is time to stop before it goes any further.

Like a very bad for me lover, I’m kicking alcohol out of my life. Forever? I don’t know. But it has to be until I know for sure I am not heading down a slippery path paved with Morning After regrets and a body that I have made healthy and strong over the years that alcohol will have no problems at all destroying. It has to be when I am not afraid of my drinking. It has to be No Alcohol until it has no power over me. When I am not lying to myself any longer about it.

Or when alcohol is not lying to me.

Because if I can’t stop after one, or if I look forward to that One far too fondly and anticipating that One too much, it is time to steer the Lil Log Spaceship away from the alcohol cloud.

And even as I write this, I am missing the person I was—the one who could sip on one drink once in a while and barely finish it before she felt all giddy and light-headed and would then just put it down. I miss that woman, but I’m not her right now. Maybe I’ll find her again. And maybe I won’t.

I love myself too much to let myself ever say, “Fuck it” to anything again. I love myself too much to poison myself and my thoughts and my dignity with alcohol. My dignity—just writing that I realize the truth: I care about my reputation and my dignity as a woman and a writer and an editor and a mother and a friend. Alcohol-induced “Fuck It’s” take away our dignity. Alcohol-induced buffoonery makes us look ridiculous. Makes us asses or assholes. And years of Living Right and Working Well and being proud of the reputation and life and work I have built can end in a destructive rubble after one night of Fuck It drinking.

I love myself, so I am going to prove it by taking care of myself. I am strong. I am independent. I am a woman who has much to lose. I am too smart for this. I am ready.

I feel relief now. As if the weight of those bottles has been on my shoulders pushing me into a hole. Free. Free. I feel free.

If you find yourself in my words, I hope you will love yourself and free yourself, too.

There is still time to click “like” or comment for the pound of Starbuck’s coffee drawing (below post). I’ll be drawing for that in about a week.

If you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to myAmazon Page. I appreciate your support! And I thank you, my readers.

I do also, suddenly, realize as I am about to publish this, that my Graces books have alcoholism- and alcohol-related themes to them. Huhn. Well now.

Black Holes. Deaths of Stars. “How to” of the day. Give-away drawing.

This from The Physics of the Universe, which has more information on Black Holes you may be article-2302364-00570A6100000258-460_634x430interested in reading: “A black hole’s mass is concentrated at a single point deep in its heart, and clearly cannot be seen.” A single point deep in its heart—ah, how poetic and lovely. In my lil log spaceship, I only skim around the places where the black holes are in our Milky Way Galaxy, because to go too close is dangerous. The blackness pulls, pulls, pulls, and once inside, just as with the light, there is no escape from it. We must search out the light and leave behind the darkness, though the darkness holds fascination and we are often drawn to its mysteries.

You see, black holes are places in space where the gravity is such that even light can’t escape; the gravity is so strong because matter is condensed into a tiny space. It can occur when a star is dying. The idea of shining beautiful stars dying is poetic in itself. Nothing escapes death—so shine as bright and beautiful as you can while you can. As the narrator in the video below says, “Out of catastrophe, comes creation.” Ah. yes.

Since no light escapes, black holes are invisible, but scientists can use their sciencey toys to look at stars close to black holes and study how they act differently from other stars.

The Big Ones are called supermassive black holes—imagine a mass that’s more than a million suns. Our galaxy has a supermassive black hole and it’s called Sagittarius A. Sagittarius A has a mass that’s equal to about 4 million suns. A whole bunch of Earth’s could fit in that black hole. But some are tiny enough to hold in my hand. *Kat takes a moment to picture this—holding a tiny black hole and feeding it light. Amazing.*

To say it most unscientifically, black holes are constantly “hungry,” and if the spaceship is too close, DSC09985we could be sucked into the blackness. Of course, then we’d know what was inside and that would be kind of awesome. Though, we’d never survive—once you arrive at the Event Horizon, time slows way down, and you are spaghettified—streeeeeetched out most uncomfortably.

Earth is probably safe, since black holes are too far away to swallow up our Earth. But even if Sagittarius A drifted our way, the black hole’s gravity would be the same as the sun and we’d just orbit the black hole.  Now, that presents problems all of its own, right? Sometimes in life we orbit around black holes instead of the sun, don’t we? Where light doesn’t escape. But we don’t stay there, because we are strong and we are fearless and we are determined. Right? Right!

Over the last few posts, I’ve talked about what it’s like to be lonely—the feelings and emotions behind loneliness. Now I want to explore our galaxy in other ways. Ways that will be helpful—I can’t guarantee I won’t become Black Hole-ish where light can’t escape and I am dark and mysterious and looming, but it’s all part of the Lonely Woman’s (or Lonely Man’s) journey, right?

Today I made you a video of how to check your oil. We all should learn how to do simple things with our vehicles, our homes, our lives. And taking care of simple things gives us a feeling of accomplishment and power. It saves us a little money, too. The first week I showed you a simple “repair” of your garbage disposal. Week after that, what to try if your ceiling fan is making noise. Today, checking your oil!

Next week, I will be talking about cooking for one. And, I’ll be asking you for ideas and recipes. It’s easy to slip into buying quick easy processed frozen food and though that’s okay for an occasional meal, preparing fresh healthy food will keep us at top performance, just as we want our vehicles to be at their top performance.

So let’s move away from the Black Hole for a while and towards the shining stars that are still brilliant and light-giving. Shall we?

Give Away: I’ll be drawing for a pound of Starbucks coffee. Beans or Ground, strong or medium or light, your choice. Coffee! Coffee! Oh how I love coffee! The winner is chosen by me drawing a name from the comments or “likes” section-either one, it’s just nice to have you drop by and acknowledge you were here so I can smile at you. My plan is to have at least one give-away a month, perhaps two. Judy D won the chocolate from the last give-away.

If you like Southern/Appalachian/Family Saga fiction (sometimes with a supernatural touch), then I hope you will consider one of my novels (or short story “snacks”) by clicking on this link to my Amazon Page. I appreciate your support! And I thank you, my readers.

Visiting Earth. The deafening loud-ass silence of loneliness.

Earth. Third planet from the sun and the only planet known to support life. It’s the only planet not imagesnamed after a Greek or Roman god. And unlike the naming of other planets’ moons, our moon is simply called Moon—this struck me today, that we didn’t name Earth’s moon; I wonder why? Though I like Moon and if they named it, I’d still call it Moon.

As Earth ages it is slowing down. Only about 17 milliseconds per hundred years, but it lengthens the days. Many millions of years from now, Earth will have a 25-hour day. What to do with that extra hour? Sleep in? Waste it? Yeah. We’ll waste it.

Though we have a 24-hour day, it actually takes 23 hours, 56 minutes, and 4 seconds for the Earth to rotate on its axis—that’s called a Sidereal Day. No, our nights and days won’t eventually be wonky. Why? Because Earth orbits around the sun and if you consider the motion from the sun as Earth orbits it as well as the rotation of Earth on its axis, it comes to 24 hours, and that’s called a Solar Day. Solar Day is the time it takes for the sun to be back in the same place in the sky—24 hours. Yeah, that sounds confusing, but really it’s not when you think about it a moment, or just accept it.

And a year isn’t exactly 365 days. There is an extra .2564 days to make a total of 365.2564 days. To make things even out, every 4 years we have Leap Year. We are so clever.

Click here to see: Earth rotating at night.

And since I usually mention a weight measure when we visit other planets, did you know that at the equator you would weigh a few ounces less than if standing at one of the poles? Gravity.

If we were aware of how fast we are actually moving, spinning through space, at, depending where you are on Earth, a bit over 1,000 miles per hour, you’d at the very least vomit.  It’s weird to think though that people on the equator move fastest and people on the North or South poles are still. So if we were aware of our spinning and moving, we’d all rush to the poles and freeze our asses off.

It is on Earth I land my little log spaceship and trek down to The City for supplies and fuel. The City where I have my home-base is tiny with only 1,000 or so full-time residents. But during peak tourist seasons that swells and quite considerably. There are people and cars everywhere. You would think dsc06364that having more people would make the lonely feel less alone, but it does not. People are not meant to be alone. Like water finding water, people find people. We are social animals. Everywhere we go, there are groups, or couples. There are parents/grandparents and their children. There are couples—lovers or friends or both. There are groups of friends. There are families. There is touch and talk and laughter and argument and discussion and kiss and hold and share.

If you are alone and find something funny or interesting or amazing, the funny or interesting or amazing loses its shine when there is no one to say, “I know! Right?”

When you have been alone in your spaceship for many days, you are not sure of how you sound or appear to others. If you speak to someone, you wonder if you made sense. If your words and 002sentences and phrases come out coherent. You forget what conversation sounds like. If you are in a social situation, you either babble a million words, or you have few words at all and stare dumbly at the other person as they wait with raised eyebrows for you to say something. You practice speaking to your little dog because you aren’t sure if your voice will go rusty—can vocal cords forget how to speak if not used regularly? You google it, and find out, here, that you’d be just fine—that when someone woke from a 19-year coma, he was able to speak. You are relieved, and also, strangely, disappointed.

Though Earth is loud, especially during the busy seasons, or when you visit other cities while on Earth, and even more especially after returning from Pluto and Mars (previous posts), there is a vacuum of silence around you. While the silence of loneliness is quite apparent, the sound of loneliness is really quite loud.

When alone most all the time, you forget what you look like. Reflections lie. They do, really. If there 074is no one to tell you that you are beautiful or handsome and sexy and wonderful, what are you then to yourself? Though you shower, brush and floss your teeth, eat fairly healthfully, drink in moderation, and sleep, and exercise, and stretch, and take care of yourself in many various ways, you may not brush your hair for days; you may wear clean but comfortable-and-not-attractive clothes for weeks; you may wander about the spaceship touching things just to make sure you are real—because if the things you touch are real, then so are you. You don’t doubt your sanity—you don’t. You don’t. You don’t. Don’t. Don’t. You. Don’t.

Some nights the loneliness becomes shapes in the dark and you aren’t even afraid. Instead you ask, “Who are you? What do you want? Guess what I saw today?” And there is no answer, so you sleep and dream of people. People people people populate your dreams—and you are doing things with the people: talking, laughing, having sex, kissing, hugging, arguing, running from them and to them. You wake from your dreams and for a moment it is enough.

You have a constant “cruel wanting.”

The paradox is: though you are lonely, you want to be left alone. Because you get it in your head that people are not to be trusted. People mean hurt and chaos and responsibility. You can’t stand it but you do.

And that’s all I have to say to you today. That’s all I got.


(P.S. I’ll have another give-away next week, as well as a Repair of the Day, and some Dinner Ideas for One – WHEEHAW!.  – Judy D – you won the Mars Chocolate drawing from last week. Email or FB message me.  . . . )

Journey . . . begins, ends, middles . . . .

Well, my dear ones. A little housekeeping is in order. First, if you are receiving this blog post in your email, it is because you signed up to “follow” my blog posts. And while I wish you will stay, if you do not wish to receive my posts in your inbox, you must undo what you did to follow me!

I hope to be traveling the Galaxy here there and yonder, and will post at least once a week. Sometimes it will be just links and/or images, and others I will be speaking with you from planets and stars and moons, or black holes.

As well, I will periodically have giveaways: my books or maybe something else if I’ve a mind to. I like doing this, for it feels good to give, even if it is something small as a kindle copy of one of my books. Or maybe some chocolate. Who might know what treasures cross miles? Ha!

But, I must clean up around here, for cobwebs and dust bunnies have taken over my blog. So if you all who stay, and/or have stayed, with me all this time will be sweetly patient while I re-do and re-structure and fiddle-dee-dee with my blog, and enter my spaceship traveler, I will be ever-so thankful and delighted.


I will return soon. Meanwhile, things are looking a little different so far here, and more to come.




Homemade Cranberry Sauce

imageHappy Thanksgiving, y’all!

Peeking my lil ole pea-head in here for just a moment to send you holiday greetings, and a quick “recipe” for homemade cranberry sauce.

Purchase a bag of fresh cranberries, wash them, put aside.

imageIn a saucepan add a cup of liquid–you can use plain water, or orange juice/orange juice/water combo. Or like I’m doing: a little water, a little fresh squeezed orange juice, a little “spiced water” I made by boiling a cinnamon stick, whole cloves and whole allspice (of course just use the spiced liquid and throw away the spices), and a little liquer (I like that orange flavored liquer but since I don’t have any, I’m using Drambuie). I also will be adding orange zest, and if I have it, lemon zest. Sometimes I add a little cracked pepper.

imageAdd sugar to the liquid: recipes call for 1 cup of sugar but I like mine less sweet so I add about 3/4 a cup or so.

imageBring liquid and sugar to a boil, then add cranberries, and bring back to a boil. Boil gently for anywhere from 10 minutes to 15 minutes, or until the cranberries are “breaking down,” stirring occasionally.

Pour into whatever dish you want, let it cool/chill overnight if possible.

imageEat and enjoy!

All photos are mine except the “finished product” at the end, which is Food Network’s (I haven’t quite completed mine yet!–preparing it as I write this!)

Here’s mine!




Well ain’t that some shit, Kathryn Magendie: kicking the ass of my fears.

I wrote this a year ago, when I thought anything at all could be possible. It bears re-reading (by me). I’m going to repost it and read it, and then I’m going to drink the rest of my dark rich strong black coffee and I’m going for a run and then I’m kicking the ass of the day–and the novel I am working on.

Kathryn Magendie

ipod photos 082I done been here, and I done been there, and I done this and I done that and I done the other. I done thangs I never done before. I done thangs I haven’t in a long long time.

I been where I’ve never been, and where I’ve seldom been, and where I’ve left, and where I’ve said I’d never go, or never return to.

This here woman done seen thangs that made her speechless with wonder. Made her stop right there and say, “Well . . . oh my god.”

This here woman done done thangs that opened her up and turned her inside out bursting kaleidoscopic super-nova–KaBOOM! Ka-POW! Ka-BAM!

And I ate things I said I’d never again eat. I broke many “food rules;” like, never eat pork: I ate bacon and damned if it wasn’t tasty; I ate peaches with the skin on them and the juice ran down my arm…

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